Prem Dan: Day 3

No mass today. Bread and bananas at 7. Singing. Walking. Arrived at Prem Dan. That part of today was routine but routine stopped after I left the visitors lounge. I walked around the corner to help with laundry and I almost ran into two men carrying a stretcher with a body wrapped in a white sheet. Someone died in the night.

I was pleased that my two exercise students from Saturday still remembered the thumbs up sign and the props that I taught them. Such special ladies. It is to the point now that I walk in the room for meals and these two, floor squatters, give me the sign with a big smile. People are special!

Maria is my favourite Spanish oriental. She is 24 and is so full of life and smiles and love and enthusiasm. But she's studying marketing business. I took her aside today and told her that if I had kids I would pay all the money I could to have her teach my kids, anywhere from 5-18 years old. She's just lovely. She makes the world a better place. When I started to talk to her about teaching she covered her ears and said, "don't tell me!" I told her I didn't decide until I was 26 that maybe, just maybe I'd be a teacher. All 26 years before that I swore that would never be me. She said "I have two years!" I think I may have struck a chord, just like others did in my earlier journey. And chords should be struck.

Amelie, a lovely 27 year old elementary teacher and philosophy student from Paris, told me one patient here dies each week. She's been here for just over four weeks and that was the fifth stretcher she saw I had my guesses on who it was but, nope, those three ladies were still with us today. Throughout the day a bunch of us volunteers were trying to figure out who died...but we couldn't do it. How sad is that?

Amelie and I chatted for most of today. She is intelligent and talking with her about world and social justice affairs was refreshing and enlightening. How we live our lives is quite similar. She has been a teacher now for two years and vows to spend her summers travelling as long as she is able. We shared travelling stories: she recommended places in Europe as well as Senegal. She is usually drawn to orphanages (like in Senegal) and doesn't like to just travel. She likes to volunteer. She wasnt very familiar with South/Central America so I shared what I knew from there. We talked about a lot of things: how India isn't that different from so many other parts of the world. The root problems seem to be the same but the density of population magnifies things. Kolkata is the physical size of Montreal but has 3 times the people. We talked about how we thought the philosophy behind the missions of charity houses (the 'mother Teresa' homes) needs to be refreshed. What they do is good and needed but it is a bandaid to the problem, is there anyone looking at the problem? Is the Catholic Church content to provide dignity to people but continue to allow such a need for a dignity to be created? Are people investigating hygiene/clean water options? Teaching skills? Working with social norms on the treatment of people? Or are they continuing to pick up the pieces because pieces continue to be created? Amelie and I do not have answers but we sure aren't afraid to ask questions. What these homes do is good and well organized and necessary, but I couldn't be here every day unless I knew there was hope that things might (not even will, might) change.

We also talked about the Chinese proverb, 'give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he'll eat for a lifetime' and we dissected the holes in this thought. (It was at this point that she apologized for being a complaining Frenchman. I said questioning is not complaining). I didnt have any questions for this at first, then amelie told me about how she was at a conference in New York and she spoke with a Kenya man who questioned it.This idea only works if we understand context (those of you who know me know the idea of context makes me happy!) There needs to be a water source with fish. Some of you are likely saying, "that's obvious!" Well, you'd think so but don't give all humans so much credit. The fisherman needs to have hands and he needs to have access to the necessary tools/equipment. Giving a fishing rod (just like handing out tractors in some parts if Africa) is meaningless if, once it breaks, parts can not be replaced. It is similar to giving a fish but it just prolongs the eventual failure. The proverb only works if the man has all the other necessary tools. This seems obvious but in my short international development experience, sometimes the obvious is missed.

Amelie also told me some stories of some of the ladies. There's Theresa who, as an orphaned child, was taken in by the sisters. She's about forty now and is slowly dying of two diseases: cancer and leprosy. Yep, leprosy: that Biblical disease which I as a North American never thought of outside of the New Testament. There are many ladies here with cancer: some treatable, some not. None are receiving treatment. As I said previously, there are at least four women who are the victims of acid attacks but I'm not ready to write that down yet for when I write things, they are no longer ideas or experiences: they are real. As I write about these women they'll become real, but I'm okay with them being "ideas" temporarily. One other lady wears a large bandage on the back of her head, similar to a yamaka (sp?). Amelie tells me that this lady lived on the streets and got a small wound on the back of her head. Then a worm infested it and the hole the worm left behind is massive, bigger than a fist. Apparently you can almost see her brain. When the lady first came, three or so weeks ago, she wouldn't walk or feed herself. She just cried out in pain. Now she does walls around, feeds herself AND I can get her to laugh! This home does have a purpose! Mother Teresa did say she was not a doctor or a social worker, but she was able to give the gift of dignity.